[Chorus:]
I never meant to give you mushrooms girl
I never meant to bring you to my world
But now you're sitting in the corner crying
And now it's my fault, my fault
I went to John's rave with Ron and Dave
And met a new wave blonde babe
With half of her head shaved
A nurse aid who came
To get laid
And tied up with first aid tape
And raped on the first date.
Susan, an ex-heroin addict
Who just stopped usin
Who love booze and alternative music
(Whattup!)
Told me she was goin back
Into usin again (Nah!)
I said, "Wait,
First try this hallucinogen,
It's better than heroin, Henn,
The booze or the gin,
C'mere, let's go in here...
*knock on the door*
Who's in the den?"
"It's me and Kelly!"
"My bad, (sorry) let's try another room"
'I don't trust you!'
"Shut up slut! Chew up this mushroom,
This'll help you get in touch
With your roots,
We'll get barefoot, buttnaked,
And run in the woods"
'Oh hell, I might as well try 'em,
This party is so drag!'
"Oh dag!!"
'What?'
"I ain't mean for you
To eat the whole bag!"
'Huh?!'
[Chorus:]
(I'm sorry!)
"Yo Sue!"
'Get away from me, I don't know you'
(Oh shoot, she's tripping...)
'I need to go puke!!' (Bleahh!)
"I wasn't tryin to turn this into somethin major,
I just wanted to make you
Appreciate nature!
Susan, stop cryin, I don't hate ya,
The world's not against you,
I'm sorry your father raped you
So what you had your little coochie
In your dad's mouth?
That ain't no reason
To start wiggin and spaz out!"
She said,
'Help me I think I'm havin a seisure!'
I said, "I'm high too bitch,
Quit grabbin my t-shirt
(Let go!)
Would you calm down,
You're startin to scare me!"
She said,
'I'm twenty-six years old
And I'm not married
I don't even have any kids
And I can't cook'
(Hello!) "I'm over here Sue,
(Hi) you're talkin to the plant,
Look, we need to get to a hospital
'fore it's too late
Cause I never seen no one
Eat as many shrooms as you ate!"
[Chorus:]
(Whoops!) (It was an accident!)
"Susan (wait!) Where you goin?
You better be careful"
'Leave me alone dad,
I'm sick of gettin my hair pulled'
"I'm not your dad,
Quit tryin to swallow your tongue
Want some gum? Put down the scissors
'fore you do somethin dumb,
I'll be right back
Just chill baby please?
I gotta go find Dave
He's the one who gave me these,
John, where's Dave at
Before I bash you?"
'He's in the bathroom,
I think he's takin a crap dude!'
"Dave! Pull up your pants,
We need an ambulance,
There's a girl upstairs talkin to plants
Choppin her hair off,
And there's only two days left
Of spring break,
How long do these things take
To wear off?"
'Well it depends on how may you had'
"I took three,
She ate the other twenty-two caps,
Now she's upstairs
Cryin out her eyeballs, drinkin Lysol"
'She's gonna die dude...'
"I know and it's my fault!"
'My god!!!'
[Chorus:]
(I'm sorry!) (What do I do?)
My God, I'm so sorry!
I'm so sorry! Susan please wake up!
Please! Please wake up!!
What are you doing?!
You're not dead? You're NOT dead!!
I know you're not dead! Oh my God!
Susan wake up! Oh God...
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